Infidelity on Campus

By Stephanie Osei-Bonsu, Intern

Infidelity… a lot of things come to mind when we hear this term. Simply put, infidelity is cheating. However, in order for the act to be considered cheating there must be a mutual agreement of commitment. Often times its hard to prove this small fact because relationships are so complicated and how one person feels about commitment may be completely different from another persons view point.

As we all know college can be and is a life altering situation. For many of us that travel from different states or parts of the state, it can be our first time away from home and our “Parental Units.” For some people, this is an opportunity to step out of what they may consider to be a “sheltered” life and experience the many diverse cultures represented on campus. But amongst all the culture, diversity, and lifestyles, there is one thing that remains and probably will always stay consistent; SEX IS A BIG PART OF LIFE. The college mindset tends to be very freeing and very selfish; people look at relationships in an expendable manner and often treat new experiences like the army, “DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL”. So although commitment may be present, it isn’t always communicated to new people who may become future dating prospects.

Add this already confusing equation to the college atmosphere and you have a possibility for dire results. As we all know, SEX CAN BE A GOOD THING, if not for anything, it’s how we all came to be. But it seems like for the college demographic, we have become so “SEXIFIED” that for some people, sex is as equally as important as eating. Because THE NEED FOR SEX IS SO IMPORTANT, as a generation, we have come up with labels for ourselves as a means to alleviate the stress and necessity of being in a monogamous relationship. Some of these terms are: boo, boothang, booty, booty call, friends, friends with benefits, and sex buddy.

When I decided to explore this topic for my blog, I automatically thought of the New Boyz song “You Ain’t Gon’ Tie Me Down”, TLC’s “Creep” and a bunch of other songs. The way I see it, if commitment is not your thing, then why bother having any form of relationships to begin with? Because no matter how much we may all want to deny it, developing some sort of feelings is inevitable. Why waste time hurting others and potentially even yourself? Communication, I have learned and am still learning, is the key to success in life. If we took the time to verbalize how we felt to one another, especially to those we are intimate with, I personally think CHEATING in relationships as well as marriages would decrease, which would most likely cause a domino effect and decrease the incidence as well as precedence of STI’s in our communities.

I remember speaking to a friend about a sexual encounter she was going to engage in. She and her prospective partner had never talked about relationships or their past or present, so she decided to bring it up. Come to find out that he had a girlfriend back home!! The guy was shocked that she had actually asked, he confessed to her that it was never his intention to even tell her of his girlfriend and that he was truly surprised that she asked him.

Whether or not you’re engaging in LATE NIGHT CREEPING SESSION, a word of advice, “BE WISE AND CONDOMIZE.” You never know what additional luggage your buddy may be carrying that they don’t even know about. THE MOST COMMON SYMPTOM OF ANY STI IS NO SYMPTOM!! CONDOMS ARE FREE ON CAMPUS AT THE SBI TICKET OFFICE OR SBI HEALTH EDUCATION.